Saturday, November 11, 2006
If I ran a mental institution
You know how the crazies get "break time" and they get to lurch around the garden and stuff? Well, when I run my own mental institution, break time is going to be called "escape time", and all the inmates are going to think they're escaping the facilities. Of course, we (the staff) will be "chasing" them, and will always round them all up, but they'll always remember it as "that time that we almost escaped." It'll be the best time of their lives. For everyone involved - especially if we get to use tazers. Tazers fucking rule.
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4 comments:
As a psych RN, my professional preference is for blow darts over tasers. More sporting.
Ooh, blow darts! Good idea! Then the staff could have competitions to see who makes more captures - the ones with the blow darts or the ones with the tazers.
I guess you're right though. We can't assume that the inmates will be running away very fast. So the tazers would not be very sporting. Fortunately, I've thought of a solution to this. Before "escape time", we replace all their regular drugs with uppers, so they're much more challenging to catch.
i think it would be pretty awesome if you ran a mental institution. i mean, then at least there would be beer.
If the staff get uppers too, then that settles it. I'm quitting my job and moving to NYC for a friendlier work environment.
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